Letting Hope Go

As I sit here trying to do some work
Fragments of past events and highlights of our relationship
Brush past here and there
Like waves rushing to lap at my feet and running off again

Fleeting hints of the levels of emotion you took me too
Wrapping me in a cocoon of nostalgia
A rich and moist history shared
Memories pulling at my heart strings

I have decided to let you go.
No. More like the decision has been made for me
Hope of reconciliation in some possible future,
Died in her sleep last night

Even if you break up with her today
There is no more US to come back to.
I thought you would always love me
It never occurred to wonder if I would always love you.

The times we tried just being friends
Always at the back of my mind
I tailored my shenanigans
So you wouldn’t use them against me should we get back together

Even in the guise of friendship
What you did to me was despicable
It took a while but I forgave you
I figured it made us even

Your attempts to re-instigate our friendship are sweet
It soothes the pain of the day you made me cry
The day I realised I really loved you
Also the day I realised I had truly lost you

I can still think of you and smile
You will always have a special place in my heart
I’m not letting go of our friendship
I’m letting go of the possibility of US.