So I probably said this ages ago when I used to write properly but a lot of what I write just pops into my head randomly and I am compelled to write it. Sometimes I'd be watching something which would strike a chord or read something or meet someone, but 99% of the time my poetry is never about me.
This is the 1%. This time last year I was going through a very difficult time and I like to think of myself as not being very emotional in general. This day however, I had a mini panic attack and completely lost control. I found myself bawling my eyes out and hyperventilating in the games room at work, which has a clear glass wall. Anyone walking by or in the breakout could have seen and possibly heard me but I couldn't control it or make myself stop. But anyways - I got through it and a year on things are better. I truly hope to never feel that way again.
Panic
Fear lances through my heart
Squeezes my chest in an iron-barbed grip
I have no control of this situation
I have no concept of what I am going to do
My airways are suddenly congested
I am struggling to breathe though my nostrils
The confusion and unfamilarity of this feeling
is causing me to hyperventilate
My eyes feel heavy and are starting to burn
Am I crying?
Fuck I'm crying!
Loud wracking sobs with chest heaving
Tears streaming down my face
In tandem with the snot dripping from my nose
And I cant make it stop ...
I cant make it stop!
What am I going to do?
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