I brace myself to venture out
As soon as I step out, the cold hits me.
Quick flap of the mailbox
No letters yet.
Good.
At least she can’t bug me to fish the letters out.
I really must cut a key.
I start to make my way down the driveway
Up comes John trolling along with his mail cart.
Cant stop.
I’m late as it is.
I turn the corner and merge with the bustle of the main street.
A young girl wearing a short skirt with a flimsy jacket.
(You know her ass is cold)
Yuppie Asian Guy with a briefcase
Tie askew, shirt untucked
(Early momo, and you’re already looking scruffy … Geez! At least make an effort!)
There’s a smartly dressed woman behind me
Nice coat.
Legs up to there.
Glossy blonde hair.
Must not let her overtake me.
Marching briskly, I see Betty approaching in the distance.
Damn.
Sweet old lady but she does witter on so.
I really don’t have the time today.
She spots me and smiles
Hey Betty.
She launches into yet another story about an accident that happened the other night.
She natters on in her low muttering voice
I can hardly make out what she’s saying.
Nod and smile in what I can only hope are the appropriate places.
I jump in at the first available pause
I really must go; I’m running late for work.
Waving goodbye, I see a bus approaching.
Shit.
I’m going to have to sprint to make it.
About 10ft away from the bus stop, I start to flag it down
The bastard sees me waving frantically and just zooms past.
Fucking tosser, wanker, bastard!!!!
(HE CANT SAY HE DIDN’T SEE ME!!!)
I hope and pray the fucker has a really shitty day.
There are no other buses coming.
I’m going to have to walk.
Fuckface, loser, ASSHOLE!!!
Its one stop but those 2mins I can shave off could make all the difference.
Blonde suited woman is now way ahead.
I must catch up.
No smile today for the garage mechanics by the big roundabout
Neither the reflection of my pink shoes in their glass walls
Nor the click-clacking sound they make on the pavement help ease my foul mood.
My heel gets caught in the crack of the pavement.
I am propelled forward regardless by the force of my motion.
FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!
Fucking London and its treacherous sidewalks!!
I am definitely going to have to re-heel them now
I can already hear the chink of the metal coming through.
DAMMIT!!!
Get to the traffic lights and I soldier through the red man
I dare any car to try and knock me down today.
The station is coming up.
Fingers crossed, I can still make the train.
I double up my speed and hurry down the tunnel to the Concorde.
Some smelly old man is fumbling for his ticket by the gates
Old people really shouldn’t be allowed out at peak times.
(Dude! Have your ticket BEFORE you get to the gates.
Also if it doesn’t work the first time, it’s not going to happen the 3rd or 4th time either!)
The display screens are flashing.
Delays yet again on the district line.
Phew!
At least I didn’t miss a train.
The worst thing is when you see them JUST pulling off as you race to the platform.
Yah! I have an excuse for being late to work.
That bus driver is lucky.
I would have sworn for him and his entire life otherwise.
It takes 7 minutes for me to walk to the station everyday.
